You Will Survive...

Such randoms thoughts today...Roll with me.

Yesterday, the little ones and I were grocery shopping.  Fiasco.  Every time, it's a fiasco.  The babes do great...it's just a spectacle.  I put them in the stroller, then STUFF the basket underneath full of our groceries.  I also carry a basket on my arm for eggs, bread, etc that would not survive the underbelly.  Well, I was in the produce section, completely loaded down, staring off into space trying to picture my grocery list (that was laying safely on my kitchen counter), when an older man was suddenly right in my face.  He smiled, touched my shoulder and said, "My twin girls are 31...you will survive.".  So nice, so timely, so sad that I looked like I thought I might not!!!

Dan was gone this weekend...we should all take a moment and say a prayer for single moms.  My.  Couple alone, with the girls not sleeping well, and it was a long weekend!  We did fine, there were no catastrophes, but I am glad we are a we.  They may have watched more than the usual 20 minutes of Baby Einstein per day.  They're super smart now...

The girls have changed so much in the last 10 days.  They are both crawling all over.  Both can go from crawling to sitting.  Both "waving".  (You kinda have to hallucinate, cross your eyes, and nod your head, but I swear, it's a wave.)  Lauren is pulling up on most anything (crib, couches, the step up into the entry way).  It's just crazy!

I love that they get to go places together now...Kate is just as quick!

We are getting excited to go 'home' for the 4th of July!  There's just nothing better than small town holidays!  We'll take in the parade, BBQ, and fireworks...and if it's not 114 in the shade, maybe more.

(It's a peeled apple...weird coloring...)

Love.

Momma

Girl Time

My ABQ bestie and I had a day!!  A fun one!  It's amazing that a day in my home, with 6 kids, 3 under 2, a dog, 100+ degree temps (ie. no outside playing), and a few crafty projects could be considered relaxing...or recharging...or just plain, ol' fun!  But it was.  (Don't tell my mom...I'm still not crafty...)

First of all, I'm sure you noticed....Daisy re-vamped (or would it be vamped as there was very little vamp there to re-) my blog!  Idn't pertty?!  I love it!!!  Yes, the babes are like DAYS old in the big one.  Yes, I have way more recent pictures.  But it was HARD for her to add that silly picture, so I'll change it (read: have Daisy change it) on each birthday.  Thank you, Daisy, for being patient and fixing me up!

Next, do you know about Pinterest?  Swoon.  You must, must go there.  I LOVE the idea of it all.  It's like a giant online bulletin board.  You can make your own (boards) and pin stuff there that you'd like to remember.  You can snoop through other peoples' boards.  You can spend hours just looking a pretty pictures.  One of my new favorite ways to waste time.  Go there.

Anywho...we found 2 crafts on pinterest, and got to work!  After a quick trip to WalMart, we made cookie sheet magnet boards (still being worked on) and cute pillow case snuggle mats (in the washer - pics of all next time!).  It was fun.  And way more fun doing it with a friend.

Hope you get to have your own crafternoon someday soon,
Love.
Erin

Melting.

Here's a little story of nap time. 

I've been frustrated with naps this week.  Like frus-to-the-rated.  Partly because nighttime has become so lovely.  At bed time we just nurse, snuggle, and then lay them down in their beds.  They play a little, sometimes cry a little, but within 10 minutes, they sleep.  Naps...not so much.  The other part of the frustration comes that they have not been napping at the same time.  Momma NEEDS to not have one awake baby at some point during waking hours.  Thus, frustration.

Well, today we had to make a diaper run (shocker) right before their supposed afternoon nap time.  I always feel like I'm up against a timer when I leave the house with them, but right before nap time triples the fear.  We went to WalMart, we made good time, they were happy, so on the way home I got to thinkin'.  I thought to self, "Self, why do you still swaddle and wrap them for nap time?  Could this be why you are frustrated?  Could the babies be frustrated as well as you are sending them mixed signals about sleeping cues?  Why don't you try the night-time approach for nap time?".  Self thought it was a brilliant, if not hugely tardy, idea.

We got home.  I got both babies in the car seats into the house.  I got both babies out of the car seats, into my arms.  I got both babies, in my arms, up the stairs.  I got my shirt up.  I nursed both babies...and took these precious moments to stare into my loves eyes...and sop up some of the sweat.  And then, I just laid them down.  There was no crying.  There was just full, happy babies smiling up at me.  So I left.

I unloaded the car ('cause you KNOW I bought more that just diapers...darn you, WalMart).  I put everything away...and played with my new concealer.  And then I listened...silence.  Ahhhhhh.

So then, I crept up the stairs, just to peek.  And found this:

And this...

And this....

And then, I smiled. 
They delivered a solution for my frustration, even though it was not what I thought I wanted.

So I left them alone.  There was giggling, and barking, and laughing, and babbling.  And then there was crying.  And then there was silence.

And then this:

Melting,
Momma

Musings...

I have writer's block.  Am I just tired?  Too ADD to sit down and type it out?  More boring than usual?  Not paying attention?  I don't know.  Just nothing great is coming to me.  Somewhere in my big brain there is a really sweet Father's Day blog.  (I think I'll post it next week, just to point out that Father's DAY really is just a made up day.)  There is a blog about my garden trapped in here.  There are some great stories about "Aunt" Sandy's visit.  There are stories and pictures and confessions.  Trapped.  So today, here are some random thoughts.  Tomorrow is another day.

1.  The girls are napping great...but not at the same time!  They slept about 3 hours each today - 45 minutes of it was at the same time, and 20 of that was in the car.  Didn't get much done today.

2.  I didn't get much done today, yet I made 2 desserts.  Yip.  I know.  I think it's because Dan and I met with the dietitian at the gym today.  He had some great suggestions about sensible choices and simple changes.  I rebel in obvious ways.  We're having rice pudding and chocolate chip cookies for dinner.

3.  I have learned that, even when surrounded by real toys and activities and a singing, dancing Momma, babies like snot sucker bulbs and wipies the best.

Lauren.  It's a fresh wipe.  Promise.

Kate.  It's as clean as I know how to get those nasty things...Promise.

4.  Lauren really is "allergic" to carrots.  We tried again...bad decision, again.  She is red and flaky.  Good news is she doesn't seem to mind, and Kate is eating up the batch of carrots I made.

5.  Centipedes are gross.  Like way worse than cockroaches and spiders - gross.  Maybe not as gross as mice.



I killed something very similar to this yesterday.  Similar only because the one I went up against was bigger and meaner and leggier and generally scarier than this one.

I apologize.  Wasn't my best work.  I'll get my groove back...check back later.
Love.
EP

Yellow Polka Dot Bikini

We went to the pool yesterday!!  It was our inaugural voyage!  And the suits were actually striped...and a one piece!  (Thanks, Leigh and Tyler!)

They weren't sold on the pool...or the sun...or the sunscreen...or the grass.  It was still a successful first trip...3 adults, 2 babies, no water up the nose!

Momma.

Wordless Wednesday

Mother of the Year

Again....and again.  Gosh, I'm so glad I'm the only Momma they've ever known.  If they had a standard to measure me by, there could be a revolt!  Let me start by saying that everyone is fine, there was never REALLY any question of whether or not they would be, and sometimes I exagerate for the sake of the story.  Shall we begin?...

We got home from a morning of fun at about 2 this afternoon.  Neither babe had napped well, both were tired and hot and grumpy, and so was the Momma.  I nursed Lauren first, swaddled her, and decided (for unknown reasons) to put her in the swing.  She was swaddled (like feet in, arms pinned, mummified), and so drowsy that she didn't open her eyes when I put her down.  Now, here's part one of the Mother of the Year...I did not strap her in.  The bar that swings down over her has to go between her legs (impossible in the swaddle) and the straps were tangled behind her (NO WAY I was going to attempt that!  She was for all intensive purposes ASLEEP!). 

I gathered up Kate, and we went upstairs.  I swaddled her, nursed her, put her down in her crib, and laid down on my bed for just a sec....when I heard a weird wimper/cry/moan/sigh from downstairs.  If the noise were a sentence it would have been, "Mom, uh MOM, I think I need you, I think I need you now...hurry please, no, I'm ok, but please, please hurry".  I FLEW down the stairs.  And found this:

Mother of the Year part 2...yip, I paused to take a picture!  How does this happen!?!?!!???  The swing was still going, she was holding on for dear life.  She had kicked her legs out, TURNED OVER, scooched down, and was attempting escape!  This child will be the death of me.

Oh, that's not all, friends, there's actually MORE.

After their nap (yes, even Lauren finally had a nap) I had them in the kitchen with me.  They were playing in the bumbos, talkin'...just hangin' out.  I decided that since I needed a snack, they probably did too.  They love bananas, we had bananas, I gave them bananas.  Instead, though, of their usual form (smushed to smitherenes) I decided they should try gumming up the real thing!  (Yip, you caught that, I DECIDED.)  They were so excited!  I went back to the task at hand, opening packages of raw hamburger.  Uh huh, you guessed it...strange sound #2 from Lauren.  She had bitten off more than she could chew.  She did not turn blue, she didn't even cry when it was over, BUT in the moment when I heard choking noises, I went in.  With. My. Hamburger. Hands.  Mother of the Year #3.  Now, before you call the health department, I didn't actually have any visible nastiness on my hands.  But, given the time, and lower heart rate, I most definitely would have washed my hands before sticking one in Lauren's mouth. 

One of those days.  I trust you have them too.  I tell myself 14 times a day that you have days like this too.  Let me believe that you have days like this....

In closing, an example of how very different my little animals are...

Kate:  Left alone with a pile of smushed banana.  Carefully picking up each piece and putting it in her mouth.  Aftermath:  Dirty hands, clean mouth, sticky tray, clean area surrounding.

Lauren: Loud banging, occasional splatters on the otherside of the room.

Aftermath:  dirty hands, dirty tray, dirty KITCHEN, clean mouth.

Grateful they're alive and well, and mine,
Momma

But I NEEEEEED You

I was on bed duty by myself tonight.  This usually spells disaster.  Invariably, it's a game of getting one into the twilight zone of sleep just to have the other cry out...start over.  Repeat.  Repeat again.  Momma leaves them crying in their cribs.  Come back in ten minutes.  Try again.  Repeat....

WELL.  Tonight it was business as usual.  Wash cloth bath for one.  Wash cloth bath for the other.  Lotion for one.  Lotion for the other.  Pajamas for one.  Pajamas for the other.  Leave them playing in a crib, Momma needed a breather.  They started to get fussy, so I swooped in.  Kate was the most tired, most sad, most grumpy, most needy...so she went first.  Take Kate to my bed.  Swaddle.  Nurse.  Snuggle.  Talk about our day.  Pray.  And she drifted off....

While this was happening I was all the time listening for Lauren.  Crying when Kate and I left the room, then babbling, then weird moan/hum/pacifier speak, then SILENCE.  Someday, silence will be music to my ears.  Not yet.  So, Kate and I prayed fast, we talked fast, we shifted into warp speed but in a soothing, Momma's not scared, voice.

As I slipped back into the nursery to put Kate down, I peeked at Lauren.  She didn't NEED me.  She put herself to bed!!  Unswaddled, un-nursed (they had green beans less than an hour ago, don't worry!), uncuddled, WITHOUT THE MOMMA!!!

Again, someday this will make me so happy.  Actually, already, it makes me pretty happy.  But there's a little part of me that wants to savor every moment of being needed.  (I KNOW they still need me, people!  I'm the food source, for crying out loud, just let me sulk for a minute!)

***Notice that the beds have been lowered in their cribs!  First time we've made a change PRE-emptively...usually we wait for them to roll out of bed before we change where they nap...***

Off to eat my feelings,
Erin

Mr. Prince

 Some things you may not know about my love:

We got engaged in OKC.  He asked in front of my mom, dad, Aunt Lanette, Uncle Steve, Amanda and Josh.  Brave.  This is the next day at Theta Pond.

He can sleep ANYWHERE.  This is not a pleasant backyard, but the OKC botanical gardens.  As in a park.  He's asleep, not posing.  I'm jealous of this gift he has.

He'd rather ride a four-wheeler up a mountain than hike it, but he will hike with me...yearly.

Goose Lake, Red River, NM

He's a good son.  With his mom...

He likes to hunt.  Poor Coyote.  I think there was army crawling involved this day.  Brother Darin really gets a kick out of hunting with Dan-O.

He welds.  He enjoys welding.  If he wasn't a chiropractor, he'd be a welder.

He likes cake.

He plans the best dates.  Raspberry picking, Mora, NM.

He looks cooler than me in impossible-to-look-cool situations.

He's a kid at heart.

Happy Birthday, my love.  I'm glad you're mine.

Things...

What a week!  (Do I say that every Friday?)  This week we have recovered from travel, recovered from teething, recovered from snotty noses.  We have worked hard to get back on a sleeping schedule.  We have added apricots and summer squash to the babes' diet.  Whew!

Among that "usual" stuff we have some BIG things!!  Sunday, on the way home from Red River, one of Kate's bottom teeth made it's debut!!  Much to Kate's frustration, I have learned that this is an impossible event to get a picture of!!  You know it's not for lack of trying!  The most notable part of this feat is that it's among the first that Kate did before Lauren!!  (Not that it's a competition or anything!!)

Tuesday we had another big event!!  I had left the girls on the floor in the living room - like usual! - and was in the kitchen getting dinner ready.  As I was getting something out of the refrigerator I saw movement out of the corner of my eye!!  Roxie?  Nope, purple movement!!  My Lauren had motivated into the KITCHEN!!! 

I say "motivated", because if I said "crawled" you'd picture the wrong mode of transportation!  It's a frogger type move.  Adorable!  Now, I'd love to try to convince you that the reason that she trekked into this room is because she missed her Momma.  Not true.  She has a deep, deep, new-found love for Roxie.  Nothing lights up her life like the sight of that dog.  Roxie has been nice, if only slightly irritated.  Again, no picture of this.  I'll have Dan help me this weekend, it's a must-see.

Kate can really make some tracks too, but only in "R" so far.  If I could just figure out a way to fashion a rear-view mirror for that girl, she'd be hot on her sisters' heels.  Heel to heel...oh, that makes me laugh just thinking of it!!  Unfortunately, she most often finds her lower haunches trapped under the couch or chair or entertainment center.  Trapped.  And sad.  I have no doubt she'll find "D" soon and join L in her adventures.

They are both sitting up so well, too!  It's just been a big week!!  I'll leave you with one last new trick...Kate's ability to make my heart stop:

This morning (and I use that term loosely, the sun was NOT up, and neither should we have been) Kate decided she was done sleeping.  I tried to trick her into playing quietly in her crib for a while...she started banging on their "adjoining wall".  Nothing strikes terror in me like the fear of one waking up the other at that dreaded hour!  So, Dan brought her into bed with us.  She had a few toys, the remote control...she was happy for about 4 minutes.  Finally, I decided to take her downstairs.  I plopped her on the floor, changed her diaper, laid out some toys, started Baby Einstein, and promised to check on her in 15 minutes...Momma just needed 15 more minutes.  I laid back down in my cozy bed and didn't wake back up for 30 minutes!!!!!!  And when I woke, I woke to SILENCE in the house.  (Well, the irritating Baby Einstein theme music was playing, but I've already mastered the art of tuning that out.)  No baby noises.  None.  I BOLTED down the stairs!!  Had she learned to crawl and left???  Had she backed completely under the couch and...oh my, I couldn't even imagine.  Calm your racing heart...she decided she wasn't actually quite done sleeping either....

Pumpkin.  BTDub, this picture was taken AFTER she fell back asleep from my stomping and running and poking and getting down in her face to feel her vibrato-snoring breath on my cheek.  My heart rate is just now back to normal.  At least they won't have to learn about my crazy neuroses at a later date...it'll have been all they've ever known.

Happy Friday!
E dot P dot

"Oh My Gosh, There's Two!"

This was the first thing out of my mouth the minute the doctor turned on the ultrasound machine when I was 6 weeks pregnant.  (I'm reminiscing, people, slow your roll!!!)  I don't look at ultrasounds, ever.  I was completely prepared for panic when I saw nothing even though my blood said I was for sure pregnant.  I had had a few dreams of twins...on the delivery table, just pushed one baby out, and they said, "Ok, catch your breath and we'll start on the second."  What??!?!!  This would be a terrible way to learn that you were having two!  But I'd also had dreams that we lived in a submarine and Dan delivered the baby 10,000 leagues under the sea.  I wasn't putting much stock in the dream!  But, sure enough, there were two!

I have been wallowing in this memory for the past 24 hours.  A new friend just found out that she is expecting twins.  She's at 6 weeks and our stories are similar, yet very different, as all stories are.  I have thought of the heartbreak of trying to get pregnant for longer than you want.  Of the inability to really believe it.  And of the absolute awe and joy and peace and wonder when you finally accept it.  In the moment, I wanted most any other story than the one we were going through trying to conceive.  In hindsight, I wouldn't have it any other way.

Can you believe that THAT turns into THIS!!

Feeling grateful,

momma

Where There's Smoke...

There's no fire.  At least not in this county, or even this state.  But you can't go outside without knowing there's a fire somewhere.  It smells like there is a campfire in my backyard, there's not.  It looks like Albuquerque is burning to the ground, it's not.  But there is a fire on the Arizona/New Mexico border.  The Wallow Fire of Arizona has been burning for almost a week now.  Last I heard it's zero percent contained.  I cannot imagine.  The fire is over 200 miles away from my house, and I don't feel very well if I'm outside for more than about 10 minutes.

There are firefighters THERE.  There are animals THERE.  There are 300,000 acres of homes and people who have it so much worse.  I just cannot imagine.

Praying today.  Feeling guilty that I don't feel the weight of natural disasters until it affects me personally.  Wow.

There is a mountain the the not so distant distance between those trees that we haven't seen in days.

Poor quality, but that is the sun yesterday afternoon at about 6.  Fuzzy, but the color is accurate.



La Familia

Oh, Red River was fun!!!  It was cool, and familiar, and comfortable, and there was a ton of good food, and some of the best people to spend the weekend with!

The Crew, minus Rusty and Derek who were fishing, and Aunt Jan who was taking the pic.

Right off the bat, let's address some of the negatives of the trip.  We missed 2 of our favorite people!  Papa Eells decided to stay home this year, and Darin had to work.  We missed them both, but I'm so glad that Meme came anyway, and that Shannon made the trip with her tribe without the Daddy. 

This has been Papa's chair for the past 6 years...we kept it empty most of the time in honor of him!

This trip is so special to our family.  We started meeting in Red River in 2004, the year of Papa and Meme's 50th anniversary.  Seven years later, we have added three in-laws and 6 kids!  We have been in the same cabin, playing many of the same games, eating some of the same foods, and sleeping in our same 'rooms'.  The boys fish, we all go for four-wheeler rides, the kids "bloop" rocks, we shop in town, sometimes hike, and always leave with at least one funny story!

This looks like a funny story, but they were just playing!

It occurred to me this year that the construction of a family might be one of the most apparent ways to watch the hand of God move.  I need each of these people in my life.  They all bring something important to the mix.  Would I have become friends with cousin-in-law Hope if she wouldn't have married into the family?  I don't know...but I'm glad God knew that we all needed her, not just Rusty.  (Just an example, I could do this with each and every person!!)  Family is cool!!  One of those things we have absolutely no control over...and thank goodness!!

The babes did great!  They are still teething/have a cold, but they performed well and even slept well one night!!

Pop's stroller was awesome!  They had lots of chats!!

Still doing laundry,

Erin





Judgy Judgerson

Once upon a time, I was a young, cute, single girl whose past-time was to sit around and judge mothers by the appearance of their children.  Dirty clothes, food on their faces, diaper only clad, and especially, dried on boogies.  Yip, I said it.  I judged you. 

Enter Exhibit A:

This picture was taken at 4pm today.  Diaper only, sweet potato in the hair, and more of a nasty nose than I've ever seen!  Things I've learned:  Boogers never hurt anyone.

So, to all you mothers I once upon a time judged, I un-judge you.  Myyyyyyy baaaaaaaad.

Repentantly yours,

E

Because I Can

Because I missed my Monday List, and because I have been a slack-attack on the camera, and because we're back to not sleeping, and because I'm the boss of this blog...it's a list, not Wordless Wednesday.  (I promise to have tons of pictures of all kinds of cute kiddos after this weekend in Red River.)

A Few More of My Favorite Things...

1.  Snapfish.  Do you know about this website?  If you have a camera, kids, and those kids have grandparents, you NEED this website.  My favorite feature has been the photo books.  I am not a scrapbooker.  I love the idea of it, I just KNOW it won't happen at my house.  I also needed an easy way to chronicle the girls months that took minutes instead of hours.  This has been my answer.  I make a photo book for them monthly.  I upload all the pictures from the month to share with family anyway, so making the book is a matter of plugging in my favorites and adding some captions.  I spend around $25 a month on this, but I order 2 books ('cause I have 2 babies), and always a copy of all the prints from that month.  I've also bought mugs and phone covers and key chains, etc.  They are all reasonably priced and sweet little gifts.

2.  Another website that Daisy referred me to recently is Warby Parker.  Since growing these pumpkins inside my belly (it does not get any less weird with time!!  They were in my belly!!?!?!!) my eyesight has been, well, we'll say, off.  Off enough that if you meet me on the street, drive defensively.  I have had a perma-scowl for months...not because I'm grumpy, but because I can't see!  My favorite optometrist, my dear Uncle Max, lives far, far away.  So, I got an eye exam, a prescription, and went on this website and ordered some glasses.  Now, they are a little trendy for my taste, and they really don't have a ton to choose from, BUT when you buy a pair, they donate a pair to someone in need.  How cool is that!  So, win-win...I can see, someone else can see, and I deceivingly look more trendy than I actually am!

3.  Onionionionionion.  Sound it out, say it out loud, now say it with your mouth closed.  This is my favorite noise uttered from the mouths of my babes.  This happens as they are fighting off sleep (why, oh why, sweet child!?!) with a pacifier in their mouths.  Sigh.

4.  Tupperware.  You remember Tupperware!!  Well, you can still find it, even though I haven't heard of a tupperware party in about 30 years.  They have a website, you can get a catalog, you can even become a rep and have yourself a party!  Well, again, this was a Daisy idea - what did I do without that girl!  I keep this dish full of cut up fresh veggies and fruits in the fridge at all times...except for this week, whatev.  I find that, for some reason, I make salads more often, grab a handful of snap peas instead of chocolate chips every once in a while, and have less stuff rot in the back of my drawers when I use this.  Daisy's kiddos also know that if it's in the tupperware thingy they can have it as a snack without having to ask first.  Brilliant!!

5.  Remember when I couldn't find the perfect pink nail polish?  I found it!!  The first I tried was from Tracy's Mary Kay website.  It's called Pink Sand, and it is pretty near perfect.  Then, Daisy got me Essie's Sugar Daddy for my birthday, and it's practically perfect too!!  After many tries, I love Pink Sand on my toes, and Sugar Daddy on my fingers.  It was a long road, friends, but the perfect pinks have been found.  I'd like to thank all those who helped me accomplish this daunting task.

6.  Dressing up babies.

Merry Christmas!  Heeheehee...

Love,

Big Momma