A List (And a Giveaway!!)

I've given up writing my daily to do list.  It was the exact same things everyday, and I found myself gauging how good of a day it was by how quickly and efficiently I made it through my list.  Silliness.

But I still LOVE a list.

1.  Lorde station on pandora.  I had to spend some time thumbs up-ing and thumbs down-ing due to some expressive language, but overall, it makes me feel like a hip mom.  (Ha!)

2.  This video 

(http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/11/19/florida-state-university-acabelles-royals_n_4303688.html?utm_hp_ref=lorde) 

(copy and paste if the link won't work, then come on over and TEACH ME HOW TO USE A COMPUTER)!  

I guess I am just obsessed with this song in general, but more...watch these girls!!  Here's my take...1. They are LOVING on themselves.  Watch that lead lady...confidence oozes off of her.  I dig it.  2. Due to my extreme (over) self confidence, I can insert myself into either the melody or harmony roles in this song and think I would ROCK it.  But that beat box????  A vocal drum line?  This, this is what I aspire to.  Don't mind me...I'll be practicing.

3.  Instagram.  It's my current favorite form of social media.  If you're on...follow me!  But more importantly, follow these girls:  @jaminato @herwelshness @tiffanyruda @theandersoncrew @underthesycamore @five_chicks_and_farmer  

These are some of my favorite people that I've never met in real life.

4.  Young Living oils.  (Coming soon, a recurring Wellness Wednesday post.  Where I act like a used to be a doctor and throw hippy opinions on wellness at you...it'll be great!)  Thieves, Peppermint, and Citrus Fresh are on my favorite list this week.  I use them to freshen the air, protect against cooties, and calm a sick tummy.

5.  My kiddos are **already** obsessed with "Hippopotamus for Christmas".  Lord, help me...it's still a month away.

6.  Gillian Flynn (author).  I love a well written fiction novel.  I'm reading Gone Girl now...here's what I love.  The chapters switch back and forth from the perspective of the two main characters.  When I'm ready an Amy chapter, I am 100% Team Amy.  When I am ready a Nick chapter, I am 100% Team Nick.  I am either the most fickle person I know, or that is some GOOD writing.

7.  The Jesus Storybook Bible  I love it soooooo much.  I learn something.  The girls listen intently.  The chapters are short enough to be bedtime manageable.  It screams JESUS on every page.  Love.  Love enough that I want you to have it!  I'll pick 2 winners!  One from comments here on the blog, and one from comments on Facebook.  (Feel free to share this post!)  It'll be random and fair.  I'll get them in the mail to you before Thanksgiving!

Happy Friday!!

I Think It's My Thyroid...

**Disclaimer - Thyroids are important.  When there is truly something wrong with a thyroid it must be addressed.  I'm attempting to be funny, not disrespectful to the 10's of you who read my blog and have an actual thyroid problem.**

I have convinced myself that I have a hyperthyroidism.  The most notable symptoms of hyperthyroidism are that 'ants in your pants' feeling, not being able to sit still, sweating, and then later, bugging eyes.  Yip, I have all of these.  I was about to go get blood work and sign up for a transplant when my dear Jen suggested maybe it was just the coffee talking.  This got me to thinking...

My day starts before I'd like for it to (6, yes, I would LOVE to sleep in til 6) via one of two methods:

1.  Jack the terrorist screaming from his room like he has probably vomited everywhere, had a terrible nightmare, is delirious with fever, AND there is a live bear in his room stalking toward his crib.  Leading to the sprint out of bed (EVERYtime) to open the door and finding an immediately silent happy baby who says 'Hi, Ma!' or maybe 'movie??'.

OR

2.  A little curly headed girl (or two) who did the ninja sneak into our room and doesn't make a peep until she whispers 'Momma!' a half an inch from my face.

Folks, both will get your blood pumping.  Good morning!!!

Then, I fire up the Keurig for her morning workout.  I like to have my first cup standing in front of the machine, ignoring the three alarm clocks, drinking it as quickly as the temperature will allow, so that I can make my second cup and go sit in the living room with them.

Next, we have rapid fire emergencies:
1.  Momma, I have to pee NOW, bad, bad...hurry Momma!
2.  I want breakfast!!!
3.  Jack is shooooooey, and he's taking off his diaper!
4.  Babe, did you fold the gowns for me to take back to the office?
5.  etc...

We are really, really trying to raise respectful tiny humans, but most of the time their initial request for something (shoes, snacks, up!, etc) are like a drill sergeants barking a direct order (or so I imagine).

There is a break in the middle of the day when a miracle happens and all three take a nap...but instead of sitting down for that hour, there is shiz to do!  And I always fool myself into thinking that if I do it all really quickly then I can sit for a second when it's done.  False.  False, Erin.  It was false yesterday, it will be false tomorrow.  They know.  Put away the last dish or last folded piece of clothing, close the final account I was working on, wipe down the last of the miraculously re-appearing yogurt smear from breakfast....and someone wakes up.  And, none of mine are very slow to warm.  They don't wake up and want to sit and rock and snuggle.  They don't crave a moment alone snuggling with the momma.  Nope, they get real busy and real loud and make sure the lazy two wake up immediately.  Game on.

There's the pep rally that is required to get out of the house...I'll race you to the front door!!  Bet you can't keep both your shoes on AND your hair in a ponytail!  Jack, want to watch a movie in the car!!!!  Oh, the enthusiasm that is required to make the job go more smoothly!!

And then, underneath it all...is me, having my 5th cup of coffee, shaking and sweating...thinking, "Ga, I MUST have a thyroid problem or something..."

Word of the Month

Gratitude.  Thankfulness.  Give Thanks.  Grateful.

However you say it, for a few days in November we are flooded with it, aren't we!?  There are the 30 days of Thanksgiving on Facebook, home decorations with the words on it, and sermons on the subject.

Have I told you that I love our church?  I grew up in a Methodist church, Dan and I went to a non-denomination with a Baptist lean church while in Albuquerque, and when we moved here we were wide open to where we might attend.  We shopped, tried lots of different ones...and it was hard.  It was hard, because there wasn't anything BAD about any of them.  When we visited New Covenant UMC though, it happened to be a week where they discussed/mentioned Canyon Camp.  I went to Canyon Camp three times, over three years about 20 years ago...but I had an emotional reaction.  'Our babies HAVE to go to Canyon Camp, Dan-o.  This is our church.'  And, as easy as that, it became our church.  

One of the things I love/am amazed by sermons is how different things jump out to/speak to different people.  Dan grabbed on to a different topic than me this morning.  He was researching on his phone and studying and very interested in something I vaguely remember being mentioned.  And when I repeated to him the phrase that sparked this blog, he said "Oh, that's good!" as though it was the first time he'd heard it.  Weird.

Gratitude.

Any feeling of entitlement will completely take the place of any feeling of gratefulness.  (My paraphrasing from A.C.'s sermon.)

Entitlement robs Gratefulness

Pride is easier than Humility

This slapped me upside the head like I haven't been in a while.  Ouch.  You can't feel entitled and grateful at the same time.  It's EITHER/OR.  

In reflection, I realized that entitlement has become my camouflage.  It has become my justification for the purchase.

Example:

We are in contract on a house!  I am so excited!  But, in an attempt to justify the purchase, I add a story to the announcement.  "We *finally* bought a house!"  "We've been moving or in rent houses for 3 years, you know?"  "I haven't done a home project in so long, I'm so anxious to get started."  

All of these statements are true.  And every single one of them is unnecessary.  Every statement attempts to remind that we have, in some way, EARNED this house.  We DESERVE it!  And, as I learned today, you can't have EARNED and DESERVE something and still be truly GRATEFUL.

Example:

We really don't get sick very often...we make good food choices, and get adjusted, and use essential oils and whole food supplements, therefore, we are entitled to good health.  

All of those things are helpful to healthy lifestyle, but I believe (yet forget to be GRATEFUL) that health is a gift.

Example: 

Our business is growing and doing great!  "Well, we did live off our savings for a few months."  "Dan works so hard, I'm glad there is *finally* fruit." 

True, again, and silly.  

Yes, the Lord has blessed us.

Why do I feel the need to justify our blessings?  Just so you will reck-a-nize how hard we work, how long we've waited, how smart we are?  How exhausting.  

We have way more than we have earned or deserve...in fact, we are the richest people I know.  

And I am grateful.

Photo Cred: Kristin Cook Photography

Acknowledgement: when your babies are little pictures are no longer current after one year.  But you get the point...

Not as Impressive

People stopped and tried to do math in their head when I used to say we had three under two.  People whistled and gave me a pat on the back when I used to say we had three under three.

It's just no big thang anymore, people.  We now have three, three and under.

Kate and Lauren turned 3!

This was my favorite birthday to date.  They were PUMPED.  The rest of us (Dan, Jack and me) all have a birthday within three weeks of each other in May and June.  It was a lot of celebrating shotgun style...and the girls noticed that not one of those parties were for THEM.  So, they started in with "It's almost my happy birthday" about June 15.  Folks, that's a really long count down to November 1.  They knew how many people had birthdays each month and marked them off an imaginary list...each moving them closer to theirs.

They asked for bikes.  And scooters.  And babies.  And new 'jams.

Their bicycle dreams came true!  It was just like Christmas morning...little 'oh my gosh!'s, and 'for ME?!'s and 'look, Daddy, look!'s.  If you look closely one has a lilac body and the other a pink.  There was not one second of hesitation on whose was whose.  Kate is pink, Lauren is purple.  Duh.

Lauren took off immediately...cruisin'.  Kate started out by EITHER being able to pedal OR steer.  It was a rough two days, but she's got it now!

We had a friends pumpkin painting party, and a family pizza party, and balloons and cakes and presents, oh my!  

Oh, nothin'...just Rapunzel and Snow White teeter-tottering...

I just can't help but make it a little about me.  It was my third anniversary of motherhood, ya'll!  I'm so in love with these girls.  They are unique and funny and the same and sensitive and clumsy and so, so strong.  They are perfect...

I am so truly blessed.

-Momma

Garage Sale

Hey Guys!  Welcome my very first Guest Blogger!  Jen Womack is my newest bestie!  She's the one this blog was written about.  I never told you that I didn't scare her off!  She took a few weeks to reply to my text, but we are friends - like for real!  Our littles are similar in ages, our sense of adventure and humor are in sync, and....importantly, she had enough junk in her garage to make my junk into enough to be a fabulous garage sale!

Here's her take:

I remember so clearly my first garage sale. It was summer, and my sister and I were looking for ways to earn money. We picked weeds and washed windows but, frankly, we had our eyes on a bigger payout.  My mom agreed to a garage sale as long as; one, we did all the work, and two, we absolutely did not have it at our house. No problem! We enlisted a friend and had our first multi-family sale. I remember the sorting, and pricing, and the thrill of a sale. I remember haggling with strangers, but mostly, I recall the stack of cash at the end.

Until this summer, these childhood yard sales were my only point of reference. Perhaps because I associate said sales with such rosy memories, two decades later, I jumped all over the invitation to combine my unwanted things with a friend’s (Erin’s) in yet another ‘multi-family’garage sale.

Now, I know this sounds a little heavy for a topic like garage sales, but it was such an  insightful weekend. I would never have guessed two days of unloading my ‘junk’ on others could invoke such a range of emotions. Here’s my take-away:

1) Garage sales are a lot of work! As a kid, the prep work was fun. It’s easy to price and sell something you didn’t pay for yourself. It is also easy to sit around with friends and make signs when you have no other obligations, namely 3 kids and a household to manage. This was so different! The week prior to the big sale was manic and my kids watched a month’s worth of cartoons and scavenged for many of their meals while I priced items and strategized with Erin. I felt like a bad mommy by the end of the week and was so happy when it finally began and we could think and talk about something else.

2) Friday is THE garage sale day in Edmond, Oklahoma. I would have never guessed this, but the crowd on Friday morning blew us away. The bargain-hunters descended long before we were set up, and didn’t let up for hours. Erin and I barely spoke the first half of Friday. Saturday, though, was painfully slow at times.

3) Letting go of your baby’s things is all kinds of hard. I had zero problems selling the plastic slide or turtle sandbox but was surprised at the pain I felt selling some of the baby clothes and tiny blankets.  “Don’t you know,” I wanted to say to the person talking me down a dollar, “that Avery wore that in her first days home,” or that “Hunter took his first steps in that romper,” and so on. But memories have no cash-value and I am no hoarder, so I let go….but, it hurt.

4) Two hormonal women + too much caffeine and sugar + too little sleep = tears. We watched an expectant mother carefully shop the cheapest used clothes for her firstborn and listened as another mom explained how she wanted to come by after pay day and shop the leftovers. It’s hard to put into words what made me want to cry. It’s not pity for them, or guilt that I feel….we’re all just doing the best we can. It’s that, pay day never enters my mind if the kids need new shoes, clothes, etc.  This was a good reminder to not take that for granted.

5) A thing is only worth what someone will pay for it.  I’ve heard this saying countless times but a garage sale is absolute proof. I had people talk me down to scandalous prices. I lost count of how many times someone tried to haggle for Erin’s liter of apple cider vinegar we were using as a bookend. One lady offered me a quarter because, ‘it’s leaking a bit.’ We sold things I would never have guessed anyone would want. And other, ‘nice’ things, just didn’t move ‘til we were willing to almost give them away. I had a woman try to give me one dollar for a pair of shoes I wanted two for with the excuse that they were a half size too big. Worth and value are certainly in the eye of the beholder.

6) Lastly, garage sales, like most things in life, are better with a friend. Without Erin, I would have made a few more trips to Goodwill and called it done. Instead, we plowed through together, laughing and sweating, and made a great team. We began our weekend with a shot of espresso and too many Krispy Kremes and ended it drinking iced white wine through a straw (no judgment…it was good.) The de-cluttering that took place in that weekend was downright therapeutic, but, for me, the most exciting part was bellying up to Erin’s kitchen table and counting our stack of cash….we were giddy as little girls.

-Jen

Universal and Personal

God is stirring up some stuff in me and our life.  Sometimes it gets ugly and hard while He's working something out...at least that's my experience.

One truth that's been made clear and repeated many times to me in the recent weeks is that we are all the same in God's eyes.  We are all His children...He loves us.  Period.

That truth has been demonstrated to me in the commonality in the human experience.  The struggle I have as a wife or mother or daughter or friend most any wife or mother or daughter or friend can relate to.  Sure, we have unique experiences and short term memory loss of some stages of life, but for the most part...we can insert ourselves into another's shoes and see the world.  It's our job to empathize.  To lighten the burden on others for the simple reason that there is no reason why that burden isn't ours.

I was aware of this last week in church.  I was feeling pretty good about myself.  I hadn't screamed at the kids while getting to church, Dan and I were using our nice words, I had showered...I was good.  And during praise and worship my eyes scanned the crowd and I saw a woman who wasn't.  She was hurting or hurt or sad or mad or sick.  I didn't take the opportunity, so I'll never know for sure.  Here's the thing...she may have 4 dozen friends ready to help.  She may have just needed a minute to get some stuff out and it happened in front of people at church.  I may have accidentally given her the stink eye on my way in and have been the cause of her tears.  And maybe a stranger asking if she could help would have made it worse...but what if it had made it better?  We're the same, crying lady and me.  We are God's children, and we are supposed to make it a little easier on each other.  But I didn't.

But there's a whole second layer to this giant cake of God's love.  So today, I'm struggling to reconcile the God who loves us.  Period.  With the God who loves us.  Personally.  Do you see how that feels different?  It's that empathy versus sympathy thing (thank you very much for Latin root words, Ann Wright).

Today it was personal.  Today, I wasn't alright.  Dan and I were not using our nice words this morning.  And it escalated into ugly...and there were 6 baby witness eyes and ears.  This means that my hurt and anger and indignation were accompanied by every mother's constant friend - guilt.  But God made it personal.  He showed me He cared for MY marriage, not just marriages.  You could argue coincidence, but I would call BS if you did.  While standing side by side, arms crossed, going over every jab and thinking of a way to make it sting worse next time...the praise band sang the song we lit our unity candle during in our wedding.  It's not a popular song.  I've never heard it at our church...but today, it happened.  And it was personal.  It didn't fix anything.  Forgiveness still had to be sought after and wounds will still have to heal.  But God whispered down to two of his, and reminded us that yes, we are just two of MANY of His children.  But He loves us personally.

All of a Sudden

You know...the 'all of a sudden' that takes three years to arrive.  The 'all of a sudden' that you'll miss if you're not careful.  The 'all of a sudden' that will probably change tomorrow.

But, all of the sudden, things are a little easier in these here parts.  Yes, there are still three under three and a new business to grow.  Yes, Dan and I are still trying to figure out who WE are, and somehow turn three blobs into human beings in the process.  Yes, I know a JINX is waiting for me tomorrow.  BUT...all of a sudden things like this happen:

**sometimes we sleep through the night.  We still have to work REALLY hard at bedtime, and morning still starts WAY earlier than I'd like, but, for all intents and purposes...WE SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT!

**yesterday, one time, I peed by myself.  And I didn't even lock myself in.  The door was open, but no one came in to check on me/be held/try to unroll the TP/...nothin'.

**Jack can run a spoon!  I usually just 'slop' his high chair tray anyway, but for things like yogurt and rice and oatmeal we were still spoon feeding him.  Not anymore, folks!  It's a disaster, it requires a hose to recover from, but, Jack runs a spoon.

**They give a little.  For almost three years, there's been a whole lotta take.  Sure, they smile at me, and when it really hurts they yell for 'Momma!', but over and above they are little mooches who only take.  But last night as I was snuggling with Lauren, she petted my face and said, 'Momma, you're my best friend.'  And sometimes when I tell them that I love them, they say it back.  And Jack will waddle right over to me and tilt his little face up for a kiss.  That's giving, friends.  That's a whole lot of filling my love tank WAY up.

**They play together.  Without me in the room.  Nicely.  For longer than 45 seconds.  Sometimes.

**The girls can be trusted to obey well enough to walk into stores just holding my hand.  This one's huge.  I don't have to park right beside the cart return, load them all up, and wear Jack to go grocery shopping.  Now, I carry Jack, hold one girl hand who holds another girl hand, and WE JUST WALK IN.  Yes, we stop traffic.  Yes, someone always comments about my hands being full.  Yes, it makes some people in busy parking lots nervous...but not me.  We walk in, boys!  I still sweat a lot.  It's still not among my favorite weekly chores.  But it's a whole lot easier than it was two months ago!

This all is said to update you on where we are.  Basically, the kids are grown, and I'm thinking of taking up tennis and cross stitching to fill my day.  (Ha!)

This is for the Mommas who are not yet at their 'all of a sudden' moment.  It comes.  It comes so gradually and so very freaking slowly, that you might miss it.  You cannot predict it.  Repeat after me: You cannot predict it.  Quit trying to calculate the ages of my babies...it won't be the same for you.  But it will come.  And it'll make you really, really happy.  And it'll give you time, finally, to teach that 14 month old #3 brand new, never been mentioned before things...like, this is your nose!  Cows go 'moo'.  Can you say 'Momma'?

Love,
Momma